I remember being seven years old and crying over my best friend because his parents were mocked. We shared long bus rides home in which he was ridiculed about how his family was different: “How did your mom get pregnant? Do you have a dad at all? How gross!” Without a worry in the world, this is what ignorant grade school children do. I would repeatedly ask my mom why this was happening. I awaited an answer that would make the mocking seem justified. Her response was simple, “Your friend has two parents that just so happen to be women, and he is lucky to have two moms who love him.” I was seven years old, but I was already grappling with the question of what defines a person. My friend was brought into this world and raised by two of the most loving and courageous people; he had everything any child could ask for.

Today, the ridicule in our community has ceased. Sometime after all the prejudiced comments and rude under-the-breath remarks were said, everyone in our community seems to have finally come to accept different lifestyles: it’s as if they have matured. The residents of our community have accepted the fact that these women are lesbians, and if a whole community is able to mature, why can’t a whole state? Better yet, our whole country?

So much progress for the acceptance of gay marriage was being made nationwide: same-sex marriage laws were passed in Massachusetts, Connecticut and California. That is, until December 19, 2008. On this day in recent history, “Ken Starr, [an American lawyer, former judge and solicitor general] filed a legal brief seeking to invalidate the 18,000 same-sex marriages conducted in California between May and November.” Ken Starr began his argument saying that “voters may not strip citizens of constitutional rights” and that “people have the raw power to define the nature of the rights.” In essence, he did not see stripping homosexual couples of the institution of marriage as unconstitutional. This legal brief, named Proposition 8, is a statewide ballot in California, stating that “the marrying of same-sex couples in California will be eliminated, providing that only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in the state.”

Expecting this to be rejected, the general public was outraged and demanded that it be repealed in the Supreme Court of California. The court heard oral arguments on March 5, 2009, and decided on May 26, 2009, that the 18,000 couples who married during the “Rainbow Window,” the 45 days from November 5 through December 19 during which gay marriage was legal, would remain legally wed. However, no more homosexual couples would be allowed to marry from then on. Since November, these 18,000 couples were “divorced” because they were no longer bound by the constitution of marriage. Now, being legally married, those couples and the entire homosexual community see the situation as a bitter-sweet victory. But really, how is the recognition of 18,000 marriages a victory, let alone a reasonable compromise made by the government? The majority of homosexual couples are still denied the right to marry—how is this satisfying?

The rebuking of Proposition 8 last November sparked the beginnings of the “Don’t Divorce Us” video movement. Campaign Courage, an online organizing hub for progressive Californians, asked the gay community to send in photos of themselves holding a sign with the simple message, "Don't Divorce Us." Regina Spektor’s hit, “Fidelity,” played as the background music and also served as the title of the video. It has become the anthem for gay marriage; however, whether she has a personal investment in this subject has yet to be confirmed. The meaning behind this song is simple: keep an open mind, for love can come in many shapes and forms.

The video opens with an explanation of the event and what the campaign is doing to reject Proposition 8. Then the pictures start rolling. Included are images of mothers, fathers, daughters, friends, even entire families holding signs stating, “Don’t Divorce my friends…my son and son-in-law…my moms…my dad and step-dad.” The couples hold signs that read, “Don’t Divorce Us.” Thinking about the couples, better yet, families that are being torn apart, makes my stomach churn. Proposition 8 not only disturbed the homosexual couples and their families, but it gave the government the right to disturb a child’s stable environment. That is not right. The primary difference between homosexual and heterosexual couples, aside from the obvious sexual orientation, is the amount of involuntary external baggage thrust upon the homosexual couples and families. Let’s state the obvious: no marriage is guaranteed to last forever, so why not give every committed and prospective marriage a fighting chance?

No matter what your stance on this issue is, we can all agree that, like anyone else, members of the homosexual community have basic human rights. Putting religion and political views aside, those rights, stated in the Declaration of Independence, are “the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” A court ruling that denied people these rights just a few short months ago is still being enforced in an America that stands for equality, freedom, and acceptance. The fight for equality was a long and difficult one, and the government “rewarded” the homosexual community by reinforcing the unfair disadvantages originally conceived by Proposition 8.

There is a huge gap between the people who tolerate and accept gay marriage and those who resist and strongly oppose it. In California, the people who voted against Proposition 8 are in favor of gay marriage, as opposed to Californians who are not even willing to tolerate gay marriage, which is really just a starting place for moving toward acceptance. If we can all just accept the fact that each person is different, a concept that was introduced to us in kindergarten, we can move forward. We should learn to judge a person based on qualities that actually matter: kindness, respect, honesty and character. Enough with race, religion, sexual orientation and gender. I thought that we as a nation had come further than this. Instead, as a nation, we dreamt of change for so long, but when it finally came, we were overcome with fear and defaulted to our ignorant beliefs. At some point, mere tolerance has to move toward acceptance.

Who are heterosexuals to say how a homosexual can or cannot live his or her life? It seems as though people are more concerned with what goes on in their neighbor’s life than in their own. No matter what the American government does to stop homosexual marriages, homosexuality will and should never vanish. In fact, I believe and hope that the homosexual community will thrive off the publicity of Proposition 8 and use it as fuel to persevere until a change greater than legalizing a mere 18,000 marriages is made. The American public should not only tolerate others’ differences but must take the next step and accept them. Only then will we truly be the land of the free.

Join the fight at: http://www.couragecampaign.org/page/s/divorce